I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize