Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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