College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
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