How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
The Olympian is in my bed
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
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