its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
