i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
