Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize