Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
