i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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