Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
Randomize
