Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Randomize
