these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
