its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
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