I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
