I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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