Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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