Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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