I heard we made out
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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