does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Never underestimate the power of titties
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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