butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Randomize
