No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
Randomize
