is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
