Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
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