tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
