I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
I had to cum in my sink.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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