Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
