do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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