Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
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