I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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