So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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