the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
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