a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
