too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
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