The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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