I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize
