Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Screwed.edu
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
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