is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Randomize
