whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Randomize
