I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Randomize
