remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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