i just had sex bonerless
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize
