I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Randomize
