so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
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