Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
