he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
