so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
