Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize