There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
