Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize
