So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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